Internal World

 Feeling nostalgic as I stumbled across my old blog site with three contents written back in 2012. Going through those writings takes me back to those days of utter confusion, frustration, and violence. What a guy i was back then, rebellious but not courageous. 

Today things have changed. Married with three kids and my mind has turned around. It’s no more about dreaming to achieve. In fact, i hardly have been daydreaming of becoming this or that. Just living life as it comes. A sense of sufficiency has come in with a tinge of joy and fulfillment. Life has taken an inward turn; a project of lifetime has finally started. Every phase of the project is a moment of gratitude and surrender. I am no more the doer. I am no more myself anymore. 

Grace has dawn in. Life is effortless, carefree, and relaxed. :)

P.S. I will continue writing on this blog moving forward.  

UNSATISFIED???

How can we be unsatisfied with what we have and what we are.  Take a look at the small example that I will be citing:

In a farmer's garden  there are lots of vegetables and flowers growing together.  Secret jealousy arises. The Potato plant thinks that its fruit is underground and wished to be like Tomato plant near by. The Tomato Plant is jealous of the  Flowers just next to it that it cannot bear different colored Tomatoes. The Flowers are about to kill itself because it could not climb up to the top of trees like the Bean Vines. Bean vine is  disheartened because it could not stand on its own like the  Chili Plant and so on …

Now the same thing applies to Us also. I am unsatisfied because Doji is more Smarter than me, Doji is unsatified because Tashi has more wealth, Tashi is unsatisfied  because karma got the more lucrative job, Karma is down as  Kinley  got  a beautiful Girl and so on..

Looking at this simple illustration what is the use of being unsatisfied? After all We are What we are. The Tomato Plant cannot be Flower, neither the Potato can bear fruit in air.. We are made to be what we are. So there is no question of Looking at others and taking them as the role model or as an idol. It is simply absurd to be taking others to be ourselves.

Like the contemporary Bhutanese try to be Koreans and you know what the shitty part is? The Koreans don’t know even that we exist on EARTH!!! What an insult!!

NIRVANA IN HELL can arise only if we are ourselves..

Thank you

Younten J

7/3/2012

Baby-School-College-Job-Girl------??

It’s been 24 long long years now since i was born. Started as Naked little baby without any idea of life ahead.. Had i know that it would be like this i would never have come out of mother’s womb. This life of mine is really fucked up now...
Went to school with a hope for studying hard and bringing Trophies home to satisfy parents and gain some personal image in the small group of few hundred children. Years went by playing and fighting. Went to High school. Came to understand that a boy need a girl and sex. Four years went by trying to impress girls in every possible sense. Luckily got through to the college. now the tension is high. i have to get a good job after graduating and for that higher marks adds more odds. realiesd few secrets of life. Thought the new found knowledge would lead me the way but NO..it’s just for the sake of realizing that i have realized. Now i understand that we learn just for the sake of learning at the Moment of Learning. it have no relevance in the Future of one’s life. in future one has to  learn new things again based on new circumstances. So we keep on learning and learing.. that is why we keep on forgetting and forgetting. Now that i have a decent job in a private company, it is tough life in here. Private life is different from Government or Corporate life in one sense that people feel guilty while receiving salary if one hasn’t done any work in the month. it's like taking some ones else hard earned money freely...In here too the thing that i have learnt are just grey memories. New thing pop up continuously and i learn to cope up with it continuously. Learning and Learning.....and Learning.... if i go on doing this for the rest of my life what is the meaning of doing that? Are we just born to learn somebody else Bull shits???
Parallel to learning at this stage dreams of getting popular, rich, significant, respectable surfaces form deep down. getting what we get isn't enough. This fantasies hunts us down day and night...i am not sure if dreams really come true or rarely comes true but one thing is sure that dreams are also just meant for that moment only??? What a World,  What a Life and  What a Child....
Once we get something we feel like we have achieved it and it is over now. But the real challenge has yet to come. GIRL. She is one thing that troubles my rational judgments. She is the one thing that is not okay if i dont have and not okay even if i have. No She is not even neutral between positive and Negative. it is something different....and at this moment i am Fucked up with this confusion or dilemma or ...

 the story is still going on Just like a Dream...

Younten J
6/3/2012

IF YOU HAVE THE WILL NATURE FINDS THE WAY

Ummm...this is the first post that i am writing in my blog. Hopefully I put things right as intended.
Well... If you have the will then leave other bullshits to the nature or the unknown or god or you name it yourself. Just don’t worry about the way if you want to do something. Whatsoever the way be...we haven’t seen it or felt it right now. And i assure you that there is no way of knowing it in advance...i mean not even the GOD!!!! How can he know what am i going to do next??? Even the GOD himself depends on our action right now to show our future direction.  From this angle our beloved GOD solely rely upon us to decide our future.....funny..
This unveils a secret that we can indeed shape our own future as desired. But the only requirement is to have the Dream Focused so intensely that it burns everything restricting the path.. Nature will Surrender the opposition to you, if not it will divert you from a different path to the same Goal..There is no way that your dream getting lost in the way unless you lose hope and dlink from it. Once we lose hope we are disconnected from it, hence dream move on independently of its own consequently filling the world with Trillions and trillions of isolated dreams per day.
Any ways i don’t wish to talk lots of rubbish an bore you so the essential Thing is the Title itself...."IF YOU HAVE THE WILL NATURE FINDS THE WAY"..

Thank you

YOunten J
2/3/2012